Navi's Misadventure
by Eladard Kikur
Summary: Navi goes off to celebrate the end of Ocarina of Time, but things kinda get outta hand…


**Author's Note: My friend Yoshistar showed me this strange Flash movie called "The Real Legend" about OoT today. Hence why Navi's kinda… weird in this fic.**

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Navi the fairy and Link the Hero of Time have finally returned to the present. They both knew that they will be parting ways. 

"Navi?" asked Link.

"Yes?"

"What's going to happen to you?"

Navi thought this through ever since they've defeated Ganondorf. "I shall return to the forest, but I shall never forget all the fun we've had."

"I'll never forget you, either," Link replied.

"Goodbye, my friend," they said sadly in unison.

Navi flew sadly out the door of the Temple of Time while Link stared hard at the now sleeping Master Sword. Once Navi left the Temple, she did a happy jig, whooped and hollered with joy.

"YES! I'm finally done with that idiot elf reject!"

Meanwhile, Link was happily doing the Macarena.

"Heck yeah! That annoying fairy has finally left me alone! Happy days are here again!"

Navy meandered around Hyrule Castle town, looking for something fun to do. Being stuck with Link put a damper on her social life. She spotted an anime and manga shop. The store was called "Ye Olde Animee & Manga Shoppe" and she flew inside.

"Greetings, milady. Welcome to Ye Olde Animee & Manga Shoppe. Dost though needeth thine assistance?"

Navi blinked a few times and said coolly "I'll be in the hentai section." She flew away and headed to the said area.

In the "Ye Olde Caddish Animee & Manga" section, Navi was scanning the shelves when she overheard a couple people talking on the other side of the shelves. _Perverts_, she thought to herself.

"Dost thou likest this drab in this book or this drab in this other book?"

"Nay, I dost not likest either!"

"Forsooth! Surely thou jest!"

"Thy heart flutters at ye sight of not drab but cove!"

"Aye, thine too."

Music began to play and Navi flew over the shelf and yelled "HEY! What the hell are you two babbling about!"

"O! We hast been spotted!"

"Forsooth! Hast thou been hither long, milady?"

"Speak ENGLISH, dammit, maguy kelle HYLIAN, khaa!" The two guys snickered at her, so she threw a couple of thick mangas at their faces.

Navi left the store and soon found a huge casino! She flew inside and was immersed in all the sights and sounds of a casino. She looked around to see which game she'd like to play. Soon she was attracted to the game of roulette.

"96 Ruppes on number 42!" said Navi.

The roulette ball began to go over each slot inside the wheel until it clicked a few times into a number. Navi held her breath, hoping for her number to be chosen.

"42!" called the person running the game.

"Yes!" Navi cried. She thought about how they'd never have much money. _Now I can NEVER be poor again!_ she thought to herself.

"321 Ruppes on number 42!"

The ball spun around before landing on the said number again. Navi cheered as she won more money. After about an hour, her luck had just run out. She had bid all her money and lost it all, every single Rupee.

"DAMMIT!"

She left the casino and found a nice bar. Feeling parched for cussing up a storm, she decided to have a drink or two... many. After several rounds of vodka, she was highly drunk. Flying drunkly around like a fly, she eventually came to the Bombchu Bowling Alley. Inside was the lady feeding the Cuccos.

"Hey, baby... Howzaboutta date...? Youse real purdy... I stink I woof you, therefore I am... Gimme a kiss, sweet thing!" Navi slurred.

As Navi flew towards the oblivious lady, someone entered the building for a game of Bombchu Bowling.

"Watch out, Eladard! There's a blue glowing radioactive fly on your shoulder!" called the customer.

Eladard whiped out a fly swatter and smacked the living daylights out of the drunk Navi. It was appropriate to say that the whole incident resembled Buzz Buzz's diminish from Lardna in Earthbound, complete with the sound effects.

The next thing she knew, she was tossed out with the garbage. Navi fell down onto the ground and woke up groggily as a strange light blinded her.

"Hey... turn down the highbeams, will ya!" she mumbled.

"Sorry about that!" said a male voice.

Navi's vison began to come back into focus and noticed that the person was in fact another fairy!

"What's a fairy like you doing in a place like this?" she asked.

"We're just going over to the Happy Mask Shop," he replied. "What about you?"

"I parted ways with another kid because I helped him complete his advanture," Navi said.

"What did you find over there?" asked another male voice.

"It's another fairy from the forest!" called the fairy. He turned to Navi and said "Come join us. The boy I'm assigned to's also a Kokiri and pretty cool."

Navi flew a little bit over to the Kokiri's hat and rested there. She laid down and mumbled "I miss you, Link! We were meant to be! Why'd we have to leave each other? _I love you!_"

"She sounds intoxicated..." the Kokiri mumbled.

"She flew like she was too..." the fairy replied.

As they were heading over to the store, Navi fell asleep and the owl flew by and nabbed her. The owl was heading southeast and entered the Lost Woods. Its talcons got caught in a Skullkid's hat and ended up dropping Navi. She fell into the Skullkid's pocket and was carried away to another part of the forest. Soon, the Skullkid went to put something it had found into its pocket and found Navi sleeping in there! The Skullkid picked her up and tossed her aside disdainfully. She was thrown through the flora and landed in front of the Great Deku Tree.

"Ah, Navi. How is thou?"

"Ugh..." Navi vomited and mumbled "...I'm hungover, dammit..."

"I hast another job for thou, but I shall wait til thou hast recovereth."

"What... job..."

"I needeth thou to be the partner of another Kokiri boy who dost not have a fairy and I summoneth him to talketh to me. Tis very urgent..." He looked down and added "Once thou recovereth."

"Not another... one... dammit!"

The End

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Author's Note: Like I said in my profile, I'll use the name Eladard Kikur as a generic Hylian name. Plus the Bombchu Bowling Alley lady's cool and needed a name! 


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